I took a friend to have day surgery this week. The staff was very friendly and they gave my friend “happy juice” during her surgery, so that when it was over she was actually in a good mood, with no idea when the “happy juice” would wear off.
They had her go over the post-operation information sheet while I was there, which had some warnings on it such as not to make any important life decisions during the next 24 hours, when she was under the influence of the anesthesia.
As I drove her home, she seemed excited about making some major life changes after the surgery, so I’m writing this as a reminder to folks who have just had day surgery that it’s important to resist the urge to:
1. Sell everything you own and give the proceeds to your two favorite charities, Wal Mart and the A-Team
2. Break that 20 year vegetarian diet you’ve been on by eating steak, goat, lamb, rabbit, alligator, turtle, venison, and lobster, all mashed together on a piece of bread.
3. Take this as an opportunity to try out your new exercise plan, “Skydive-weight lifting”
4. Get a tattoo that says, “I just got day surgery and all I have to show for it is this lousy tattoo.”
5. Decide that this is the perfect time for you to paint yourself red and run with the bulls in Pamplona, Spain
6. Call up your friends to set up a game of “taser tag”
7. Combine your two favorite hobbies of covering yourself with massage oils and going rock-climbing
8. Invest all your savings into Silly Putty
9. Rewrite your will, leaving all your money to “Bullwinkle”
for at least 24 hours….after that maybe consider the life changes a little more seriously…
